Green Tip #1001: Get to the Point!

Well, now that I'm done with my four year self-imposed Internet exile driven by a need to cut back on energy use, I've spent the past week trying to catch up on what's been going on in the world, especially as it relates to Global Warming and the modern Green Movement.  So I brushed off the ole cobwebs off my keyboard, booted up the ole laptop and searched "climate change" in the ole Internet search engine.

Aaand found this:
Republican Candidates Questioned on Climate Change

Dang it... I don't want to talk about politics on this blog... 1) It's the same debate we've been having for years and 2) It's really boring and 3) the only people who care about politics these days are the people who go to bed at 7PM after watching reruns of 'Matlock' (is my reference to old people too dated?  I really feel out of touch after my hiatus.  Let me know if you have another old person reference in the comments below!)


(Thanks, Matt Groening, I know I don't have rights to use images from your show!)

Sorry.  Way off topic.  I'm trying to make a point about politics and I went off on a tangent.  (Also, sorry for fishing for comments.  That's just unprofessional of me.  If you think my request for comments was uncalled for, let me know by leaving a comment below.  And you can also subscribe to this blog by clicking on-)

Dang it!  I really do want to get to Green Tip #1001.  Because it's a really really good one.  But first I need to make a point about politics.  You see, Groucho Marx once said about politics: (did you ever think how funny it is that someone with the last name 'Marx' would have a quote about politics?  And what's even funnier is that his first name is actually Julius.  Like Julius Caesar!  Ha!  Well okay, maybe not as funny as some of the Marx Brothers routines.  And I say that subjectively.  Because I don't really think they're that funny.  I just mean that people in general think that the Marx Brothers are funny.  I personally think that they just didn't age well.  Some of the humor has gotten lost over the last several decades.)

But anyway, what was I talking about?  Oh, right, Caesar Salads...  So I've found that it's more environmentally friendly to use organic lettuce and chicken... that... was raised...


(Get it?!!  Because it's Green?!)

I wasn't talking about salads, was I?  Shoot.  Talk about losing your train of thought.  I'd go back and read what I was typing, earlier, but I turned the brightness way down on my laptop to save electricity and now I can't make any of it out.  (Coincidentally, if you ever catch any typos on this blog, that's the also reason I don't go back and profreed!)

Well, I guess the point of this that I was trying to make was that I should just Get to the Point!  I know many of my most loyal readers believe that the Internet is just a fad and will go away in a few months.  Those same readers religiously print off my posts and keep paper copies for when the Great Internet Crash of 2016 happens.  And all my ramblings are just adding to that much more paper that is going to be wasted when they do print my posts out.

So there it is!  Green Tip #1001!  Get to the Point!  Oh and speaking of points, I did want to point out that subscribing to this blog is as simple as clicking on the link on the right hand side of your screen!  And if you think that I'm being obnoxious and overbearing with this whole subscribing thing, you can leave your thoughts in a comment below.  And if you think that the comments are too much, please leave a reply to the previous comments letting those commenters know.  And of course the first commenters can't be outdone by the second commenters so they should reply back with comments on how they think.....

Green Tip #1000: We Did It!!!

HOORAAAYYYY!!!!!

We've finally won the war on Global Warming!  And I have to thank you, my dedicated legion of followers!  We, as the Impractical Green Resource Army, have driven back the eco-apocalypse and the Four Horsemen of Climate Change (Greenhouse Gases, Climate Change Deniers, the Great Pacific Garbage Patch and Sad Pictures of Polar Bears on Shrinking Pieces of Ice)

That is to say... I think we won.  Right?  I mean, after 999 Green Tips over the past five years, I have to imagine that we've finally conquered the threats that faced our fragile environment.

But.... I have to be honest... I did sort of turn off my Internet sometime in early 2011.  Let's just say that I was concerned about how much electricity my router was using (by my router I of course mean my neighbor's. Thanks NETGEAR17!)

But all my dedicated readers wouldn't let that stop them from reading interesting an effective ways to reduce their carbon footprints, would they?  Nevermind that I shut my laptop off in mid-2012 to save electricity and have been typing Green Tips onto a seemingly non-responsive keyboard.

I guess now that I think about it, maybe I don't have the best grasp on how computers, blogs, the Internet, common sense or rational thinking work...  I was wondering why nobody was commenting on any of my posts...

Well, now that I realize that the last four years of posts never made it to you, I guess that means I'll have to start over from the beginning...  (Dang, Green Tip #794 was sooooo good, though!) Expect to see some major overhauls of the blog in the coming weeks.

And, now that I'm back posting new Green Tips for everyone on a semi-weekly (bi-weekly? Semi-? Bi-? Eh, who knows???) basis, be sure you subscribe to this blog or follow me on Facebook.  Links to both are on the right hand side of the screen.  Or left if you're holding your phone the wrong way and have somehow managed to read this whole thing upside down.  Kudos to you if that's the case!

Thanks for reading!  Or maybe shame on you for wasting electricity to read this.  I'm still a bit confused on that point...

Green Webcomic #5: Veganism

Another one about meat?

Green Webcomic #4: Tasty Organics

As if we needed more evidence that bacon is the best food ever...

Green Webcomic #3: Rainbow

Green Webcomic #2: Know Your Cycles

This just proves that Awesome things and things that are Good for the Environment are rarely one in the same.